if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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