plz talk dirty to me
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize