Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
