Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i dont even know how to be here
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
