Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
