Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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