So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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