My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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