Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Randomize
