Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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