Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Just pee around me
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
