While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
