Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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