i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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