yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
