dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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