her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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