I've blown a few things in my day
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize