This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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