chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
