Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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