What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize