Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize