Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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