i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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