She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I have post one night stand depression
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