I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
His nipple licking is glorious
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