Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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