Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
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