i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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