Redeem this text for a blowjob
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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