Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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