white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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