Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize
