Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
