just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
How does one acquire holy water?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize