Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
