Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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