Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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