Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Girls should come with a carfax report
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Randomize
