good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
