She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I just googled if crying burns calories
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
