# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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