# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
