so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
