MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize