I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
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