your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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