The best revenge is premature balding
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
