Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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